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punk-clemmings:

I don’t care if you hate Taylor Swift, if you wake up on your 22nd birthday and don’t sing 22 you’re doing life wrong bye

apuarius:

Today my dad told me he was hungry and I looked at him and said “hey hungry I’m daughter” and he was kinda shocked

guy:

yeah baby i am an ANIMAL in bed. more specifically a koala. i can sleep for 22 hours a day

satansmokesmeup:

weed is great b/c a minute ago I was thinking about killing myself but now I’m apologizing for stepping on ant

theunbreakablev0w:

fake-n-bake:

I don’t need to go to college I can learn anything I want through youtube tutorials 

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hex-girlfriend:

i’m still pissed off about growing up

stmungos:

theshipqueen:

friend: you speak french?
me: yeah
friend: say something in french!
me: je suis venu ici pour passer un bon moment et je suis honnêtement sentir si attaqué dès maintenant

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realitytvbitch:

Friend: “Hey remember in 6th grade when y-“

Me:

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